taking a chance on yourself
“If there is one thing I’m willing to bet on, it’s myself.” — Beyonce.
There have been countless nights when I would stay up streaming motivational YouTube playlists. — The list could continue forever: the Perfect Morning Routine, How to be more Productive, How to stop Procrastinating. I would watch these videos for hours and feel empowered to get up and start something… tomorrow.
I’d then start this cycle of self-doubt, feeling like the life I want just isn’t meant for me. It’s not in the cards. Maybe it will come to fruition sometime in the future. Perhaps I’d wait until my birthday comes around to enact change. If not then, then certainly when the new year comes.
I would fall into this routine of habits that would withhold what I truly wanted from life. But it wasn’t for the sake of willpower or passion. It was the lack of focus and discipline. I was learning to ignore the first moments of feelings and jump into the work. To create or build anything worthwhile in this life will take work. There’s no amount of conversations of prep that can move the needle more than just starting.
I realized it didn’t matter if I’d heard that same advice repeatedly; I wouldn’t move unless I were truly fed up with the alternative. The tension and stress that builds up for moving outside your purpose grow in weight as each moment passes. I’d imagine a fish out of water would feel like. It’s not only uncomfortable but unbearable. It’s the reason I believe that people turn to vices and distractions.
Anytime I felt the slightest bit comfortable, distractions were easily accessible at my fingertips. But, to be honest, I got fed up with this toxic cycle. I wake up early for work to show up on time. It was time for me to take a chance on myself. Show up for me to truly become the person I dreamed of being. It has been said that Rome wasn’t built in a day, and in that regard, I deem that to be true, but I believe you can change your entire life in a year. Day in and day out, putting your dreams and aspirations first will change you bit by bit.
So I hope this year brings transformation. To have the courage to take the risk and bet on yourself.
Precious Pioneer ❤
